“I really enjoyed that.” DJ waited until Payne woke up to admit that. Both their heads are on separate pillows and their bodies are naked underneath the covers. Their faces are in opposite directions.
“So did I. I really did. I mean, I don’t know how I feel about you sucking my toes and I don’t think I can suck as well as you but I enjoyed it. A lot. In fact, can you suck me more often?” Just as Payne mentions that he sits up and looks in DJ’s direction. This is serious for him.
“You know how I am. I’ll do it more if you do it more. As far as anyone knows, we are both sucking and getting fucked. Your manhood remains where it was whether a dick is in your mouth
or not. Same as whether it’s in your butt or not, Payne.”
This was a tired argument the two of them have been having for a while. DJ has never considered himself to be a total bottom. Yet, that is the role Payne has carved out for him. Payne’s excuse is that DJ’s penis is too large for him. DJ’s response is always, “Yours is bigger and I have a smaller body.” And to that, Payne always responds, “And yet you’re able to take it. I just know I wouldn’t be able to.”
By now, you would think Payne would have come up with something that wouldn’t send DJ into overdrive. “You fucking think I want you to pound the shit out of me and like a fucking slave I’m going to be okay with it? Fuck no! I do it because that’s what you like and because I love you. If I didn’t think you were worthy of my time I never would have let you fuck me to begin with. Letting you penetrate me was my way of telling you I was interested in you. But you can’t seem to return the favor. Don’t you think I have the same urges to penetrate you as you do me? You know, people already think I’m penetrating you. Did you know that?”
“Stop. There is so much you just said that I need to unpack. Can you calm down so we can discuss?” Payne was using his psychology minor now. Whenever DJ went off on the deep end he would always find a way to calm him down.
“I’m sorry. Okay. That just upsets me.”
Payne responded by showing his teeth in his cheshire cat face. Payne started slowly, “So you love me, huh?”
“Yeah I lu…” In DJ’s anger he hadn’t realized he had confessed that truth to Payne. It was a fact he had been sitting on since before he got on line, but he never thought the moment was right to confess it. He didn’t want Payne to think his emotions were based on anything he was getting from him. As he thought about it, Payne finding out like this was probably a good thing. “Yes. I have loved you for a while now. I was hoping you would have admitted it first because I know your feelings are a bit harder to reach than mine. I just didn’t want to seem weak by admitting it.”
Payne smiled. DJ thought perhaps this would be the moment Payne would confess his affections but that never came. Payne simply moved on to his next point. “So you’ve been talking to people about us?”
“No. I’ve not said a word to anyone about us at all.”
“You just said people think I’m the bottom.” Payne’s words rang with such disdain and condescension that DJ had to calm down before he spoke. He catalogued this and decided to bring this back up once all other issues were dealt with.
“Yes. I did. But just because people think you’re a bottom doesn’t mean I’ve been talking to them about you. In fact, your own frat brother brought it up. He told me the last time he had you you were moaning. He asked me if you moaned when I was inside you.”
Payne’s face showed shock and rage. DJ chose his words carefully. He wanted them to sting. He wanted to cause as much emotional pain as he could.
“What frat brother? When?” Payne’s questions made DJ think that perhaps Payne had given up the booty more than the one time he was raped. The thought of that incensed DJ even further. However, he had to remind himself to stay on topic.
“Tommy. Yesterday. When he was in my room. He’s been following me.”
The casual way DJ admitted these things were just as shocking as the details of how he had been penetrated before.
“How could you be in his presence and not tell me? What do you mean he has been following you?”
“Like I said, it was yesterday. You know he is friends with my roommate. You didn’t stop to think we would have some interaction? You know what he is capable of and yet you never assumed he could do the same thing to me?”
Payne stared at DJ. DJ didn’t know which of his likely many emotions were most present. DJ continued to attack.
“Yeah. He knew I stayed on campus last night. So, that tells me he knows when I’m here or not. I mean, he could simply be asking my roommate or he’s telling him without really understanding what he’s doing. Either way, Tommy specifically told me he’s been following me. He’s probably been at the window listening to us.” DJ points to the window that sits right above the bed they were sitting on.
“I can’t believe you wouldn’t tell me this as soon as it happened. And it’s not possible he could be watching us from the window. It’s too high up for him to reach.”
“You’re delusional. My 14 year old sister could see through this window. And if the chapter asked him to watch me and he realizes I’m coming to your place, don’t you think he would have told someone from the chapter? Anyone from the chapter could be looking through that window.”
“He wouldn’t do that. He just wouldn’t do that.”
“Why the fuck wouldn’t he? No one knows about him. He didn’t put his reputation on the line to get a gay guy in the chapter. And now, they think we are fucking. So now, you’re on the hook for trying to get two gay guys in the chapter. He didn’t do that. His reputation isn’t in question.”
DJ had really stuck his foot in it this time. And he knew it. But he didn’t care.
“But I would have picked up on that. Someone would have brought it to my attention. No. None of this is true. I can’t believe that.”
Now it was DJ’s turn to look at Payne. His look was one that told Payne that he was the one that wasn’t thinking clearly. Payne has a good relationship with the brothers in his chapter. But he had to consider the possibility of everything DJ was sharing with him right now. As he thought, his face went through some contortions. Those looks worried DJ.
Payne got out of the bed and walked to his cell phone, which was in his suit coat in the living room. He picked the phone out, read the notifications then searched for his vice president’s contact information in his iPhone. DJ didn’t say a word. He simply watched Payne slowly walk back into the bedroom and sit on the bed.
DJ could hear the phone calling out. He didn’t know who Payne could be calling in this moment. A part of him was scared because he felt that whatever was going to happen would change things for both of them.
*******
“Hello. Shawn, we need to talk. What have you been hearing about the line?”
“The line? Why do you ask? I haven’t heard anything, to be honest. But then again, I’ve been studying for this test so I haven’t really been in the house a lot lately.”
“Okay. So I just got a call from the university. They just told me they received a video of seven men dressed in black crawling on the parade ground and running to the frat house. They said they got the video from another fraternity. Plus, they also told me campus police was called to the frat house and someone refused to let them in the house. Did yall have those guys over at the house without my permission?”
“I mean, I don’t know. Like I said, I really haven’t been around lately. Do you want me to talk to the guys? I mean, when did they call you with this? You think it’s real?”
“Do I think it’s real? They have a video of seven men going to the frat house! We have seven guys on line.”
DJ starts whispering to Payne. “There are eight guys on the line, not seven.” Once Payne realizes this he couldn’t help but suppress a smile.
“I tell you what, find out whether campus police came to the house. Also, tell your line brother, Quincy, to contact the line. They need to meet up at the alumni chapter house on Tuesday at 6 p.m. Brother Bradford and I need to meet up with them. The university needs us to investigate the situation and give them an account of what the guys on the line have to say. Make certain you find out what happened with the cops at the frat house. Also, find out why they kept that from me. By the way, Tommy, he’s been around a lot lately. What’s that about?”
“Honestly, I don’t know. I wondered about that too. Okay, I’ll get with Quincy then find out who was at the door. I’ll also find out why Quincy has been around lately.”
*******
“DJ, there are too many issues you have to deal with when you become president of a chapter. You aren’t a member yet and because of that you don’t know everything. I let you hear that conversation because you are going to become a member of the chapter. Plus, I need you to understand the power I have in the chapter. I’m going to suspend the line. I won’t let anyone harm you and no one will disregard my authority within the chapter.”
DJ was floored. But he was also concerned about what he was just told. If the line is suspended, how could the chapter respect them. He understood where Payne was coming from but he couldn’t help but think about himself. He didn’t want to seem insensitive. And yet he didn’t know what to say that wouldn’t come out sounding bad. He decided to simply keep quiet.
“Let me tell you about Brother Bradford. He comes across being real hard but he’s not. Try to get to know him. Charm him. He’s going to probably concentrate on Jackson a lot so try not to sit on him like you normally do.”
Payne was giving orders and it wasn’t something DJ was used to from him but in that moment he decided to let him have it. Low key, it was sexy. But at the same time it wasn’t something DJ could allow him to do unchecked.
“Also, there are so many holes in the video. All the white boys recorded was people in black clothes. That’s it.”
“That’s it? That’s your proof that we didn’t actually do what they said we really did?”
“Yeah.”
As DJ spoke, he remembered that night when he had to leave Payne’s apartment to meet up at Jackson’s. They were instructed to meet at Richie’s house. He remembered that night because the Assistant Dean, Chance, showed extreme shock when he saw DJ at Jackson’s apartment. DJ didn’t understand the shock.
*******
Then Chance offered the following, “I thought you would have been at Payne’s apartment.”
DJ felt found out. Why would anyone automatically assume he would be at Payne’s apartment? There was something he wasn’t doing right that he needed to fix if Big Brother Chance thinks he was going to be at Payne’s apartment.
His other line brothers either didn’t hear Chance or played it off. For his part, he was ready to hide in a corner. DJ was so self-aware that at times he didn’t really pay attention to other people. That was at odds with his innate ability to understand people. He could simply look at someone and know something was wrong. He might not know what the problem was but he knew there was a problem.
The line made an agreement with Chance that he would be the only person in the chapter to know where Jackson’s apartment was. He also agreed that when he came he would treat them like the men they were. However, that worked both ways. The line was supposed to say that Chance would haze them and make them recite their history. In fact, Chance would come and tell them what information the brothers would be looking for specifically. The line made him look good and he prepared the line for the onslaught that was to follow.
Chance told the line that they needed to go to Richie’s house. Richie didn’t seem to like that. “My wife is there. I thought we weren’t supposed to let anyone know we were on line.”
“You mean to tell me that your wife doesn’t know you’re on line? Where the hell do you tell her you’re at these hours of the night?” Chance’s words were like sharp daggers piercing into Richie.
Understanding there was no logical way to explain that to him, Richie answered, “She knows.”
Richie’s line brothers gave him a look of unforgiving displeasure. Chance, on the other hand, seemed to be impressed. “Of course she knows. How else could a married man be able to go home at night. The girls I’m fucking act like I’m screwing all of Baton Rouge. As soon as I say I’m hazing yall dumb asses they immediately seem to understand. I can stay the whole night and they won’t question it. It’s the best damn excuse ever.”
Once Chance leaves, Richie’s line brothers, especially Guy, lights into Richie. Guy could not understand how Richie could admit that to Chance. Guy was afraid of the ramifications; he did not care that Richie broke the rules. To DJ’s ears this entire conversation was a complete and utter waste of time. It happened and no one was punished for it. If the line is to be punished then it will happen. At this point, it simply makes more sense to deal with the matter at hand.
DJ tunes the entire argument out and started watching tv, a violation of the rules of being on line. The tv is located on the opposite side of where his line brothers are. They are in the kitchen area sitting and standing around the table, which is located near the front door. Lee, Chance’s roommate and the president of the line, is seated on the sofa immediately behind DJ. Lee has his face cupped inside his hands. It’s clear he isn’t feeling this discussion either.
After he hears Guy and the ace of the line, Anthony, go back and forth about this issue with Richie, Lee stands up and unleashes. “I don’t give a fuck what happened. You just heard Chance basically tell us there is no way any of us can make it through without telling someone. Fuck, the whole time Chance was on line, their sets was in our apartment while I was there. So what the fuck do you think they care about this petty bullshit argument. We are about to be late and you know them fools about to call and give us their order before we get there. We are wasting time and I swear if they give us extra wood because of that I’m not taking it for none of yall bitch asses.”
DJ hates confrontation but this argument seems to be contrived. Nothing about it seems real. Every now and then, DJ turns to Seven to see his reaction. He seems to be just as disconnected as DJ but he is seated at the table. Seven is much more social than DJ with their line brothers, however, the guys on the line seem to dislike him. It’s a weird relationship they have with Seven.
After Lee barks out orders to the guys, they set out to go to buy the normal orders then go to Richie’s place. Once they arrive there, Richie’s wife greets them at the door. Richie didn’t call her ahead of time but she doesn’t seem to mind their presence. In fact, she seems to be in good spirits because of their presence. She looks at DJ and smiles. DJ hadn’t considered the fact that she has seen him enter Payne’s apartment in the past until that moment. She doesn’t even mention it now.
Instead, she starts off asking them about their experiences. At first, the guys don’t want to say anything because of the argument they just had. She looks puzzled, almost agitated. Sensing this could work to his advantage, DJ responds, “It’s tough. It’s been tougher than I could have imagined. I’m from a small town and I never heard about greeks. All of this is new to me.”
She smiles and from that point she goes on this tirade of information about her experiences being a member of ETC. Initially, Guy was visibly upset that DJ would answer her question but once she started sharing information it proved useful. So useful, she was giving them information about how long they will be on line and that there would be three phases of the process. She explained the complexities of those phases. She even shared how important information was to their process. Her words seemed to focus everyone. She was being useful and she enjoyed it.
As a line, several people did there very best to avoid other members of their line. In general, Anthony, Guy and Lee were the closest. It almost made sense. Anthony is the ace of the line, Lee is the line president and Guy is the most outspoken. Jackson and Richie both have a connection because of their military background and their age. Both are in their late twenties. Chris, the tail of the line is also the youngest person on the line. He is a freshman and was in a summer program before the start of the fall semester with Anthony. Though they had that in common they weren’t the coolest however, from time to time, they spent time together because they had similar classes. DJ and Seven were close and from time to time they both spent time with Richie and Chris. Because of her they were all now talking to each other across their petty differences.
As they talked, Anthony reached for his buzzing cell phone and everyone knew this moment was about to change. DJ secretly wished that call had not come. He genuinely enjoyed the dialogue he was having with his line brothers. Anthony moved into Richie’s tight kitchen to take the call. DJ watched Anthony while he was on the call. He would often ask them for information and DJ had unofficially become the one to interpret Anthony’s needs for the line.
As this was going on, DJ reflected on why Richie’s wife was always looking through that window and now that he is in their apartment he understands why that is. Their kitchen seems smaller than Payne’s but the window sits above the sink. She was washing dishes or cooking every time he thought she was spying on him. That explained a lot to DJ.
Anthony was done with his call. Anthony didn’t need DJ this time. Once Anthony was ready he started telling everyone what the big brothers wanted them to do. They were instructed to simply wait for their dean to arrive. They were told to make certain everyone had their boots on, hoodie mask and a black t-shirt. They were going to be outside exercising tonight.
Outside, the weather was cold and it had rained about two hours earlier. This is the exact type of climate DJ hates the most.
When Quincy shows up he tells them to leave all their things at Richie’s house. Richie instead instructs them to put their things in their cars. Richie’s wife is normally asleep by the time they are done with set. DJ has had to bring Richie home a couple of times and fake like he was going back to Dawn. He knew Richie was being honest. After they moved their backpacks into their cars, they join Quincy. Quincy and Payne have been talking at the door of Payne’s apartment for everyone to see. It was clear Payne was upset about something but no one knew what about.
Guy asks to talk to Quincy one on one. Guy had been complaining about missing his job with the local newspaper. He worked circulation so he always worked a late shift. That was part of why he missed so many sets. When Guy returns he announces that he will be leaving to go to work. This pleases DJ.
When Payne and Quincy are done arguing, Quincy walks up to them and smiles. His smile is directed right at DJ. Beneath that smile though, DJ could sense tension. Quincy tells them to follow him. He breaks out into a sprint and they all follow suit. Payne and Richie’s apartments are actually right across the street from the campus. Once they leave the complex, they have to cross the street. At this point, all nine of them are together. Quincy warns them not to run in a line and to make certain they scramble their order. Quincy whispers in DJ’s ear, “DJ, I want you behind me the entire time. If anyone passes you I will personally give you seven licks every time it happens.”
Fuck. The last time DJ ran was during his freshman year when he felt he was gaining too much weight. He knew his lungs would start burning any moment. Behind him, he could hear the thumping of boots and the gasping of air. Jackson and Richie were his biggest threat. Both of them are still active in the Army. Both of them are also in ROTC so they spend time each week running the entire campus. Quincy is also still active in the Air Force and in ROTC. Quincy’s muscles and slender frame were especially easy to see now. As cold as it was, Quincy only had on jogging shorts, tennis shoes, and a long sleeved t-shirt. Quincy never wore underwear so DJ could see his extra digit swinging. It never impressed DJ but Quincy certainly liked touching it.
After running up hill, DJ could feel his lungs tighten and burn. He was gasping for air so loud Quincy had to stop to make certain he was okay. When Quincy turned, he noticed everyone was gasping for air. This enraged Quincy. Quincy wanted to make certain all “his boys” were in peak condition.
“Y’all pissing me off right now. Lee big fat ass is bad enough but even you Richie and Jackson...you Army dudes aint shit. I do not want yall looking bad when you cross. Y’all gotta get chicks. The more chicks you get the more “house” we get as a chapter. We need “house”. Our chapter depends on it.”
That was the most human Quincy seemed to any of them. In the past, Quincy simply dealt with them as if they were drones. This time he was pleading for something bigger than himself. They understood the stakes. After they run most of the campus, they run across the muddied parade grounds.
DJ remembers hearing people shout at them but he couldn’t make it out.
Once they get on the parade ground and Quincy is sufficiently paranoid, he makes them crawl on the grass and mud. From there they run to the frat house. Every part of their bodies is covered with grass and mud. They were so dirty, Quincy couldn’t handle it. He told them to leave the frat house immediately. That night ended with all of them back at Jackson’s place.
*******
Through FaceTime, Quincy officially informed the line of the meeting they were to have with Brother Bradford, the advisor of the chapter. He told them what was being claimed but instructed them to act shocked. They all knew the allegations were true so many of them didn’t understand how anyone would believe their story. But Anthony and Guy were adamant that they simply do as they were told. DJ had an inkling of what would happen, probably better than the rest of them. However, DJ couldn’t help but think perhaps some of his line brothers were talking to other big brothers in the chapter. Their blind devotion to the words of these fools was an amazing thing for DJ to wrap his brain around.
Before Quincy ended the call, he told them they had to participate in a quiz bowl the next day. He asked them what organization were they going to represent. Guy is a sociology major so he quickly volunteered they would represent the sociology club. Quincy also told them that some of the Epsilon Eagles would help them prepare.
Everyone was dog tired but they were also hungry. Chris, DJ and Seven decided to go to McDonald’s to get something to eat. The three of them always had a good time together but today Chris was a bit more distant. He kept checking his text messages and was avoiding calls. That was the first time DJ thought that perhaps his line brother, Chris, could be gay. Chirs was doing things DJ normally does. Chris was hiding his phone and avoiding calls that could be overheard. DJ decided to disregard the thought. He was prone to make wild assumptions because of his paranoia.
They planned on dropping Seven off at his dorm. It was the same dorm that Chris lived in. Chris was supposed to drop Seven off and then bring DJ back to his car at Jackson’s apartment complex. But Chris asked to deviate from that plan. As tired as DJ was he sensed he was needed. Chris was in a particularly good mood.
Chris confided to DJ that his girlfriend is acting crazy because he had to tell her that he might not get to spend time with her on Valentine’s Day, which is tomorrow. Valentine’s Day falls on a Tuesday this year and that’s the same day as set. Knowing this would be the case, Chris planned ahead and bought chocolate, a card and red roses. He said he was going to give her the gifts and would be back in less than five minutes to bring him to his car.
Alarms went off for DJ. This dorm is an all male dorm. Not wanting to jump to any conclusions, DJ opted to play it cool and leave it alone.
Once Chris let DJ in his room he went straight for the gifts but placed them on the bed. He needed to use the restroom. The restroom was down the hall in this dormitory. Something told DJ to look at the card. The room was dimly lit but had two beds. By now, everyone knew Chris didn’t have a roommate, which was an oddity for someone who lived on the fifth floor.
The card was already written in and signed. It read, “ Damon, you know I love you. I love everything about you. From your deep voice, the curve of your ass, your thick muscles and how you moan when I’m inside you. And oh yeah, you make me laugh and I love how after we argue our relationship seems to grow stronger. I’m sorry I can’t be with you on Valentine’s like we planned. Please forgive me. Chris”
DJ read the card at least three times. The first time he read the card he assumed he misread something. So, he read the card a second time. The second time confirmed what he thought he was reading the first time. But he decided to read the card again, just in case he was misunderstanding something. But after three times, the information was conclusive. His line brother is gay.
For the remaining time DJ was on line, he had constant fights between his line brothers but what they learned through the process was that they had each other’s backs. Shortly after they crossed, they formed divisions based on the relationships they had while they were on line. They each tried to move passed those divisions but they were always there.
However, the best memory of brotherhood DJ felt from his line brothers came the night they crossed. Lee received a call from Payne. The fact that Payne called any of them had everyone on high alert. Lee didn’t seem to be too distracted by the conversation he was having. However, everyone was curious. When Lee was finished with the call he handed the phone to DJ. DJ was expecting the other shoe to drop at some point. He knew he would not be crossing; he would not become an Epsilon.
“DJ, this is Payne. How many hours are you enrolled at Wesley?”
“I’m enrolled in two classes so that’s six hours.”
“Yeah. Per fraternity and university rules, you cannot begin the process to becoming an Epsilon.” With that phrase, “you cannot begin the process to becoming an Epsilon,” DJ knew someone was listening to their conversation. Their process had started months earlier. He was referencing the national process.
It is fair to say the process DJ had gone through changed his outlook on fraternal life. Before he had gotten to this stage, DJ did not understand the distinction between those who pledged and those who didn’t. However, he wasn’t ready to disown a man for not going through a process but he certainly looked at them differently. The news he was getting from Payne was hurtful. He couldn’t even ask questions to understand what was happening in full detail.
Once DJ hung up the phone, everyone had a pretty good understanding of what was happening. Lee was not a full time student at Wesley. That was a fact that even his line brothers had not figured out. They did have a lot of questions about where he was spending his time and his answers were always vague.
For their part, his line brothers were all supportive. They all told Lee and DJ they would always consider both of them their line brothers. They had earned that level of respect.
But DJ’s situation was one everyone knew was going to be dicey. It wasn’t a secret but the fact that he might not be able to cross actually came out when a former dean of a line came to town.
*******
Big Brother Travell Johnson was someone they all feared. The reputation the big brothers built for him left everyone scared of him. In an effort to protect some of them, Payne called the line brothers DJ had expressed more affinity for over to his apartment. Jackson, Seven, Chris and Anthony are there with DJ in Payne’s apartment. For the most part, they had been given Saturday’s off but this was a special day because of Travell’s presence.
This first Saturday in March was a perfectly sunny and warm day.
When Big Brother Travell knocks on the door and announces himself DJ immediately assumes this is a trap. Payne had expressed some power struggles between him and Big Brother Travell so he thought it inconceivable that he would show up at Payne’s door. Payne opens the door and the light from outside immediately fills the apartment so much that some of them must squint in order to see him.
“Wassup brothers!”
DJ doesn’t flinch. He had been conditioned to deal with foolishness and hellish behavior. What he knows is none of them will get paddled because it will get too loud. When Big Brother Travell realizes they are aspirants he immediately smiles but turns his attention to Payne. They exchange greetings and Payne gives him the fakest of smiles. Were it not for that fake smile DJ would have continued believing this is a set up.
Big Brother Travell’s very presence sucks the life out of the control Big Brother President has. All power immediately reverts to Travell. Payne knows it and DJ hates it. As DJ scans to check the reactions of his line brothers, the only one who readily greets him was the ace, Anthony. That lil bastard always gets a hard on for being hazed. He always seems to want to be hazed.
As Travell and Payne talk in the bedroom, the line is placed in another room, Payne’s computer room. They can hear the back and forth. Travell is upset about the line’s progress. He also expresses genuine disdain for having Lee on the line. This was shocking to everyone. Chance, Lee’s roommate and the Assistant Dean to their line, always told them how close he was with Travell. They would have assumed he would have had a problem with DJ instead.
Once Payne fully explains himself and the actions of the chapter, Travell has a better understanding. He still doesn’t care for what is going on but he at least understands. They laugh for a few moments then he slowly moves back to the line.
Travell walks to the ace and asks for history. The line snaps to attention and gives it without falter. He is impressed. He asks what history they were last given. From that he knew to ask the line to spit out “If.” The line snaps to attention but their delivery was not good. Not good at all. Seven’s accent was new to him and so it was hard for him to understand. He spent some time ridiculing him then moved on to asking them personal information about each of them. When he gets to DJ he lets him say his name and then lights into him.
“Shut the fuck up. How the hell you think you’re going to pledge my frat, my chapter, and you’re a mother fucking student at Dawn? Bruh. How the fuck does that happen? Has anyone ever heard of that happening?” Then Travell turns to face DJ directly. “Just answer this question for me, are you gay?”
DJ had never been asked that question since the day of his interview. This time, the question and his answer are of extreme consequence to him. Plainly, and without emotion, DJ responded by saying, “No, big brother, I am not gay.”
“You sure? I mean, I can’t have no more gay shit in my chapter. We already have two mother fuckers in the chapter that’s gay. You know what, even if you are gay at least you’re on line. For that, I’ll leave you alone.”
But Travell wasn’t done. This time, he turns his attention to Chris. Chris had a habit of looking and sounding gay when he started to give history. As far as DJ could tell that was his only “tell.” So it made sense that Travell would have noticed it too.
“You’ve got to be gay. No doubt about it. Don’t even lie. Payne, I need to leave. I entrusted the chapter to you bruh and now we got all these punks in the chapter. I need to drink and fuck some pussy. Too much estrogen in this bitch.”
Travell laughs as he walks out of the room toward the living room. DJ can see the reflection of his smiling face from a picture on the wall. All of this is for show. No one knows but him and Payne.
Now that Payne understands Travell’s plans, he feels comfortable telling them to leave his apartment. As the line walks outside they see Guy walking up. His presence was a surprise to all of them. No one contacted him about this. DJ doesn’t understand how he would know they were there. He wasn’t coming from Richie’s apartment.
“Bruh, where you been. I been text you,” says Anthony.
“I had these lil chicks over my place last night. They wanted this black “cock”. I told them to bring some liquor so I got some left. Let’s go by my place and chill.” Jackson said that in his usual way. He loved to brag about his sexual exploits and they usually made everyone laugh. He accomplished his goal. It broke the tension of the situation and they all laughed.
Seven, Chris and Anthony all declined the invitation. Anthony had to go to his mom’s house to help her with something. Seven just doesn’t drink and doesn’t want to be in their presence. Chris says he has to spend time with his girlfriend.
Hanging out with Guy is normally a situation DJ would avoid because he doesn’t care for him but he wanted to spend some time away from Payne and the entire situation. This was as good an opportunity as any. Plus, he didn’t want to go back to Dawn. He has grown to enjoy spending time with Payne at Wesley.
Guy offers to drive both Jackson and DJ to Jackson’s apartment. As they make the ride, without warning Guy acknowledges that he spoke to Travell. Travell seems to have told him that he accused DJ and Chris of being gay. The entire time he’s recounting the conversation Guy does not look at DJ. DJ feels this is not going to end well. DJ is sitting in the back while Jackson rides shotgun. Jackson is wearing a muscle shirt. The view from behind the seat allows DJ to see the dome of Jackson’s perfectly bald head and his protruding biceps. The sun would shine on the right side of his dark chocolate skin making him look irresistible.
Guy, in contrast, is wearing dress shoes, flimsy pair of blue pants and sweater that slightly rolled up like a turtleneck. His wavy hair is a dark brown color that mixes with its black roots perfectly. Guy has a round face and almond in color. His skin isn’t perfect but the overall presentation he gives makes you overlook that one flaw in his physical appearance. DJ knew he needed to pay more attention to the bullshit Guy was peddling but he didn’t have the energy for it. DJ knew he was simply going to deny anything Guy says anyway.
Finally, Guy says, “Man, I don’t want no fag for a line brother. If someone is gay I just wish they would say it so we could deal with it.”
Jackson laughs. Guy’s words really weren’t direct enough for DJ to respond to but now Jackson’s response surprised Guy. “Man. Fuck it. If somebody gay, that’s good for me. It should be good for you too.”
“Huh?” Both Guy and DJ said that simultaneously.
“I said, if someone is gay I’m happy about that. I know I’m fucking women. The more women the better. I’d like to have a different freak every night. The more gay dudes there are the better for me.”
Jackson effectively neutralized the conversation and yet DJ couldn’t help but wonder if that was Jackson’s way of protecting him.
“Yeah, I hear ya. But we really can’t have no fags in the chapter.”
“You heard him, Guy. They already have some in the chapter. And if you believe they weren’t there before I think you’re being a little naive. Look, I would never want to be gay or have gay sex but why should I care whether someone else does.”
“Because if they are in the chapter and on your line, you are saying you endorse that.”
“Like I said, I don’t care. Plus, they usually have a lot of female friends. Friends I can fuck. Your problem is you’re too scared someone will call you gay. If you know you’re straight then that’s all that matters. I want pussy. Now, if a dude wants to suck my dick I’ll let him. Now, I said that. What you gonna do to me?”
DJ couldn’t believe the conversation they were having about him as if he weren’t even present. DJ didn’t know whether Jackson was low key coming out or just protecting him. One thing is clear, Jackson is willing to fight for his principles.
“But you like women. You like fucking women.”
“And? Niggas like sucking my dick and I let them. They give head better than chicks most times. That’s all they do is suck each other’s dicks. They’ve perfected that.” Jackson sits up in his seat and turns to DJ and adds, “If some dude were to offer to suck your dick, SUCK YOUR DICK, I know you would let him.” Without waiting for a response Jackson turns back around. But this time, it was Guy that shocked them.
“I aint gone lie. I let this dude suck my dick once in high school. Shit was good.”
The way he was able to cup his dick and nuts in one hand told DJ that he didn’t have anything too impressive. However, he was attractive in a way that Andrew wasn’t. DJ had never found anyone with so much muscle to be attractive and yet he was. His suitemate would often smile when DJ walked in and would then drop his hand and continue doing whatever he was doing.
